Written Pyramids

Child 1: (pointing to my iBook G4) That's your laptop? It's so thick!
Me: No it's not! It's not the new Air computer, but it's not thick!
Child 2: Yes. It's so old!
Me: I got it my junior year of college. It's two and a half years old.
Child 3: Wait, so you just graduated?
Me: Yes.
Child 3: Like, just?
Me: Yes. In May.
Child 3: Then how are you teaching?
Me: What?
Child 3: Aren't you supposed to be a lawyer or something?
Me: WHAT?
Child 3: Aren't you supposed to have a real job? How do you only teach on Sundays?
Me: Well, Monday through Friday I work as a journalist.
Child 4: (clearly excited by my career choice) YES!

Thanks for cheering me on, kids.

Relatedly,
Me: Please put the book away. Please stop reading.
Student: (exasperated) That's like telling a fish to stop swimming.